failure

I recently had the experience of being called a failure as a nurse. This is the second time in my life &  almost 10 year career as a nurse to be called a failure. 

As it sunk in through the rest of my shift, its roots kept growing deeper- doubts kept in- anger- frustration

No tears would fall that night- no words against the person would come out- it would be held inside where it festered.

As the next morning woke me, I quickly discovered the same feeling & emotions were still lingering. 

as I opened my devotional- I remember being desperate for something to help me- I prayed... "Lord, You see my heart & You see the stain that one person's words have left on me. Help me up from this hit."

Mark 6:3-4 "Is this not the carpenter, the Son of Mary, and brother s James, Joses, Judas, and Simon? And are not His sisters here with us? So they were offended at Him. But Jesus said to them, A prophet is not without honor except in his own country, among his own relatives, and in his own house."

With tears streaming down my face- I saw it-- I felt it--- God had wrapped His loving arms around me & just held me there, reminding me that Jesus, in his home town with his own siblings was no honored or accepted. What a comfort in knowing that He knows exactly how I feel.

He reminded me that I will not do things perfectly, I will make mistakes, but I am no failure. 

Jesus kept after what He knew His purpose was while on Earth- it doesn't mean it didn't hurt or that He didn't feel the emotions we feel. But He held on tight to His Father because He knew it would all work out- that He would succeed & do the most amazing thing in the world.